The Way God Made Us: The Story of the Naked Choir

I think that this was a story that was a very long time in the making. Although I only thought of the story two years before I ended up writing it, I think that what really inspired it was that when I was young I read a magazine called Weekly World News, which is like the original fakenews, as they would make up things like bat boy and other crazy stuff, but I remember in one issue there was this article about a naked church where they had all of these pictures of people, albeit censored, being naked in church, and I think that that fired up my young imagination just as I was approaching puberty and stuck with me all those years. Then years later I actually found those images available online in archive of the magazine, and I think that that was probably where I got the idea for actually writing a naked story about it.
I wouldn't be surprised if there actually was some kind of church like this, and I thought it was an interesting story that explores the spiritual aspects of being naked and the human body and everything like that. I couldn't imagine myself in a church like that, but it would certainly be interesting, and it just shows that not all religions are necessarily repressive, in fact some go pretty far in the opposite direction, but in the end my characters managed to be open-minded and realized that they are better for each other than a lot of the other more narrow minded people in their lives. It also makes a good point that if there was a God who created us in his image and meant us to wear clothing then why weren't we born dressed? It is similar to a story in one of my earlier collections called The Church of CFNM.
This story involves mutual male and female nudity, naked in public, embarrassed nude male, CFNM and CFNF.

The Way God Made Us: The Story of the Naked Choir
"I don't know, are you sure you want to date Rebecca, she seems like one of those kind of uptight women, and I heard that she is actually really religious and everything, comes from an incredibly religious family," Jackson said.
    "Okay so I'm not very religious," Ned said shaking his head. "I'm certainly no Ned Flanders, that's for sure. But look how damn hot Rebecca is, can you imagine being with a woman that attractive?"
    "I wonder what she looks like naked!"
    "Okay dude seriously you can't put that image in my head, because now I can't concentrate on anything else. But I don't care if she's religious, I could deal with that, I'm a little uptight myself, I'm not usually the type to get naked on a first date. It might be better to take it slow, being with sort of a shy conservative girl might actually not be so bad."
    Jackson shook his head. "I don't know dude, if I was with a woman like that I would barely be able to restrain myself from tearing her clothing off at the first opportunity that she allowed. But I guess everybody's different."
    "But I think I'm going to do it, I think that I am going to ask her out. I will have to just swallow my pride and try not to be so shy."
    Ned went over to where Rebecca was and as soon as he saw her smiling at him he was already getting nervous and was thinking about turning around. The very idea that a woman that attractive would want to go out with him seemed absurd, she was way out of his league.
    "Hey Ned," Rebecca said with that big smile that was just melting Ned's heart.
    "Oh hey Rebecca," Ned said already feeling as though he were getting cold feet. Asking out a girl was always difficult for him but he knew he had to grow more of a backbone if he ever wanted to get anywhere with her.
    "Hey Ned how's it going," she said still smiling and waiting for Ned to make the next move.
    "Rebecca this may sound a little bit weird, but you think maybe you would like to go out and do something sometime? Like maybe we could go out this weekend."
    "Well I can't miss church on Sunday, I've always been really strict about that and everything. You could come to church with me if you want, I mean if you don't think a college-age girl being religious is kind of a weird thing, especially in California like this, well I understand."
    "I have to admit that I'm totally not religious but I mean am am open-minded about these things."
    Rebecca smiled. "Well not all religious people are Bible thumping fire and brimstone fundamentalists, I actually come from a very open-minded and very tolerant church. You're not going to see any kind of shaming or homophobia or sexism or anything like that at my church, believe me, it's a very progressive and open-minded kind of church."
    "Well okay then, I guess I will see you on Sunday then."
    "Great, I'll see you then."
    Ned went back over to Jackson who high-fived him.
    "I can't believe that she decided to go out with you," Jackson said.
    "Yeah but it was just to go to church with her, so I'm not expecting anything wild or crazy to be happening. But that's okay, like I said I'm more than willing to take it slow, a little bit old-fashioned like that, so a girl like Rebecca is perhaps the ideal woman for me."

    The rest of the week all that Ned could think about was the fact that he was actually going to be going out on a date with Rebecca. He didn't even care if it was going to some stuffy old boring church, just the fact that he was going to get to go out with Rebecca was enough for him to be on cloud nine.
    "I don't really have that much formal dress wear," Ned said as he looked through his closet to look for some of his nicer clothing. "I just hope that there's not like a strict dress code or anything, I don't want to feel that I'm underdressed, but I really have mostly casual clothing. I don't want to make any faux pas that are going to ruin things with Rebecca."
    He decided that he would just put on a nice jacket and outfit that he had, that should be good enough. Maybe it wasn't a suit and tie but it sounded like it was a pretty progressive church. He actually didn't know exactly what to expect at a church, as he hadn't been to any type of formal religion since he was younger, and didn't really have any formal opinion on spiritual matters.
    Ned decided it was probably easiest to just meet Rebecca at the church, and as he approached the church he saw that it looked as though it were a pretty big church that must have had a fairly decent following. Outside he saw on the message board come as God made you, there is no shame in that.
    "Hey Ned I'm glad that you could make it," Rebecca said as she approached. He was a little bit relieved to see that she was dressed rather casually, which made him feel better about the fact that he wasn't overly dressed up.
    "I hope what I'm wearing is okay and appropriate for church because I really don't have much formal clothing," Ned said.
    Rebecca laughed. "You are really silly Ned, didn't I tell you we don't care about things like that, we are a very nonjudgmental and very open-minded church. Didn't you see our motto written on the message board outside?"
    "Come As God made you," Ned said as Rebecca nodded. He couldn't help but smirk to himself because when he heard that he thought that God had pretty much made him naked, and he couldn't help but begin laughing a little bit.
    "What's so funny?" Rebecca asked as she continued smiling.
    "Nothing, I just sort of thought of a joke I heard, it's kind of an inside joke," Ned said shaking his head. He didn't want Rebecca to think he was some kind of pervert, although he didn't also want her to think that maybe he thought she was overly naïve simply because she was religious.
    "Well come on, services are about to begin shortly," Rebecca said as they walked into the church as Ned saw a sign that said undressing room on it as Rebecca started heading towards it.
    "What is the undressing room," Ned said as he stopped Rebecca.
    Rebecca laughed. "Come on Ned it's pretty easy, just follow me," she said as he shrugged his shoulders and followed her.
    Ned practically stopped in his tracks and did a double take as he saw men and women in the undressing room actually getting undressed as they slowly slipped out of their clothing and hung them neatly on hangers that were provided.
    "What the hell," Ned said. "Sorry I didn't mean to swear in a church but, seriously what the hell?"
    Rebecca laughed again. "I guess you have never been to this church before Ned, but that motto outside, as God made you, well maybe you didn't get the idea, but this is a nudist church."
    "A nudist church," Ned said trying to look her right in the eye even as he found his eyes wandering to the fact that there were naked men and women around them hanging up their clothing casually like it were no big deal. At first he thought this had to be a joke but as he looked at all of the naked people around him he was beginning to feel that being underdressed was something that was no longer something he needed to be concerned with.
    "You don't have a problem with nudity do you," Rebecca said as she began getting undressed as Ned felt all of the blood rushing downward as his heart began beating.
    "Seriously, a nudist church," Ned said.
    "I guess I should have told you, I just didn't think that you had any problem with the human body or anything like that," Rebecca said as she finished getting undressed and hanging up her clothing as she stood there naked in front of him with her hands on her hips looking extremely comfortable with the fact that she was completely buck naked.
    Ned didn't even know how to form words. He couldn't believe that Rebecca was standing there in front of him completely naked, her stunning body completely on display, as she was smiling and didn't seem the least bit embarrassed or awkward about the fact that she was naked.
    At this point Ned couldn't disguise the fact that he had a raging hard on which made him suddenly feel self-conscious in spite of the fact that at the moment he was the only one in the undressing room who had not yet undressed as he began covering himself up.
    Rebecca laughed. "You don't have to be embarrassed about that Ned, it happens, it happens a lot until you sort of get used to it. But there is nothing sinful or shameful about natural biological reactions like that, as God programmed our bodies to respond to beauty with excitement. You're not saying anything Ned, is everything okay?"
    "It's just I have never been naked in a church before, or in public before for that matter," Ned said now feeling intensely embarrassed about the fact that he was standing there surrounded by naked people with a very obvious erection.
    "Well I suppose there is a first time for everything," Rebecca said still smiling and looking completely not bothered by the fact that she was still completely naked.
    "Hey Rebecca who's this, and why are they still dressed," another woman said as she came over who also had a pretty rocking body as far as Ned was concerned.
    "Oh hi Lucinda, this is my friend Ned and I think he's a little bit shy," Rebecca said.
    "Nice to meet you Ned," Lucinda said shaking his hand, and he was trying his hardest not to stare directly at her cleavage and breasts, but it was very hard not to when they were all out on display right in front of him like that.
    "Nice to meet you too," Ned said, hardly being able to form words and he felt that his hands were probably sweating, and that his pulse was probably racing, and that Lucinda probably noticed.
    "Anyway there's nothing to be embarrassed about, God made you the way he did and there is nothing to be ashamed of about that," Lucinda said as she started walking off, and Ned couldn't help but stare at her perfect ass jiggling up and down as she walked.
    "Come on Ned, we don't want to miss the beginning of services," Rebecca said. "Do you need help getting undressed?"
    "I'll be there in just a minute," Ned said as Rebecca nodded and left him there in the undressing room. Was he really going to go through with this, was he really going to get naked here in a church like that? He was glad that it wasn't a repressive church, but maybe it went a little bit too far in the opposite direction!
    Ned took a deep breath and very reluctantly, very slowly started getting undressed and hanging his clothing neatly on a hanger in the undressing room. He then took another deep breath and walked into the church where he could see that the pews were basically filled completely with naked people.
    "Over here Ned," Rebecca said waving over to him as he took a seat next to her with their bare naked flesh touching.
    Ned couldn't believe that he was sitting there naked in church between two very attractive naked women and he was wondering if it would be considered a sacrilege if he accidentally blew his load right then and there. Ned knew that he must be blushing intensely.
    "Hey Ned, you don't feel weird about this do you," Rebecca said as she could see that he was clearly shaking in the pews.
    "No of course not, there's nothing wrong with being naked in church," Ned said laughing nervously and trying to convince himself as much of that statement as he was anybody else.
    "Exactly," Rebecca said as everyone began facing forward but Ned couldn't help but have a wandering eye. He couldn't remember having ever seen this many naked people before. Not all were as hot as Rebecca by a wide margin but naked was still naked!
    "Everybody please rise," the pastor said as he approached the podium which interestingly enough concealed his naked body from the parishioners.
    Ned felt really reluctant to rise because he had already arisen in a certain area of his body that he was hoping that nobody would notice, despite how obvious it was. As he stood up with his erection pointing straight forward he found his eyes darting to the side to see if anybody was staring at him, as he couldn't remember the last time he had felt so utterly embarrassed but also so ragingly turned on, and in a church of all places!
    The fact that the woman standing up in front of him had a really great ass that was inches away from that area of his anatomy that he was hoping that nobody would notice was certainly not making it easier.
    The pastor than instructed everybody to hug the person next to them as Ned found himself hugging Rebecca and then hugging Lucinda and this wasn't helping the situation. Having direct physical contact with naked female flesh was not going to make his erection go away anytime soon.
    Once everybody had seated in the church Ned was surprised to find that it was a fairly standard sermon about charity and love and good work and not being judgmental. It certainly was a progressive church, none of that fire and brimstone stuff that had turned him off from religion when he was younger, but the fact that nobody seemed to be phased about the fact that they were naked made him feel really out of place there.
    He also couldn't help but notice as his eyes wandered around the church that lots of the stained-glass and lots of the murals on the wall depicted men and women who were naked and seemingly not ashamed of it.
    Finally when the church service was over Ned had actually managed to calm down a little bit but he knew that he hadn't stopped blushing and probably hadn't stopped trembling almost the entire service.
    "So Ned what did you think of our church," Rebecca said smiling.
    "Well it was certainly different from the way I remember when I was younger," Ned said. "In fact I can't even remember the last time that I was in a church."
    "Well it's never too late to come back to God, he's always there waiting for you," Rebecca said still smiling, still not the least bit bothered by the fact that everybody could see her naked.
    "I remember when I went to church as a child that the Adam and Eve story was kind of told differently, where Adam and Eve suddenly became ashamed when they realized that they were naked."
    Rebecca nodded. "Well we have a different interpretation of the Bible here, here the story of Adam and Eve is rather different. Rather than being ashamed when God saw that they were naked God encouraged them to celebrate his creation. In fact one of the principles of our religion is that it is somehow sinful to hide what God has created. In our faith we believe, we have sort of a holy saying, if God had meant us to be wearing clothes we would have been born dressed. Obviously he has nothing that he wants us to hide, and in fact it would be positively sinful to hide ourselves when we don't have to if at all possible, as the human body is God's most beautiful creation, and he wants everybody to see his best work on display. You don't have to feel ashamed of being naked before God, he knows exactly what you look like already. I hope that someday society will become more understanding of our faith and allow us religious exemption to having to wear clothing in public."
    "So you basically just spend all your time when you are not out on the streets completely naked?" Ned said.
    Rebecca smiled. "Of course, I mean you don't stay dressed all the time do you?"
    "I mean I get undressed in the shower, and you know if something sexual is going to happen."
    "Our church doesn't consider nudity to be inherently sexual," Lucinda said as Ned once again started covering himself up. "I didn't mean that in the sense that we thought there was anything wrong with being sexual. You don't have to feel guilty Ned, just because you are appreciating all of the beautiful bodies that God has created all around you."
    "Does it make me a pervert that I'm getting really turned on by all of the naked flesh on display," Ned said.
    "It's just a little weird now because you aren't used to it, but if you come to the church regularly you will think nothing of it," Rebecca said. "You may not believe this, but at one time I was a little uptight about getting naked in church, but after a few services I realized that it was no big deal, and I'm sure that you will eventually realize that as well."
    "Rebecca, Lucinda, it seems you have brought a new member to our church," said one of the female pastors said as she walked over, and once again Ned felt all of the blood rushing to his nether regions as she was far too attractive to be a pastor!
    Ned immediately began covering himself up again as this was just mortifying.
    "Don't worry about that, we don't judge people for things like that here, God created the male body in a way that things like that are only natural and shows that you appreciate the beauty of the female form," the pastor said. "I'm Luanne and I hope that you don't feel uncomfortable in our church."
    Ned shook Luanne's hand and once again felt his hand was trembling a little bit. "I feel a little bit out of place, and I have to admit while you are up there giving your sermon it was a little bit difficult to concentrate on what you were saying."
    Ned knew that now he was looking down at his feet and blushing but Luanne was just laughing.
    "You know I get that a lot from new parishioners, personally I'm a bit flattered, I didn't really think that I was all that distracting," Luanne said as Ned tried his best not to stare at her breasts, but she had some pretty big ones, and he didn't know how any man in that congregation was able to look away from them. He had no doubt that she was probably one of the reasons a lot of people were going to church.
    "Well I mean," Ned said once again finding it hard to find words. He didn't know a polite way to say that her breasts were huge and walking around naked like that what was she expecting?
    "Hey if what God gave me helps me get more people to see the light that is certainly nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about," Luanne said once again laughing. "Anyway I was wondering if any of you would like to sing in the church choir?"
    "The church choir," Ned said. "You mean like up in front of everybody, singing in front of everybody, singing naked in front of everyone?"
    Luanne nodded. "I guess some people are a little bit uncomfortable about the idea of speaking or singing in public."
    "It's not so much the singing or the speaking part," Ned said as he felt himself fiddling with his thumbs trying to do anything to distract himself from the fact that he was standing there naked with three attractive naked women around him.
    "Oh you are going back to the whole nudity thing again," Luanne said shaking her head. "It seems a lot of people get really hung up on that aspect, I never understood why, it's so comfortable to be naked. Well anyway I hope that you will think about it, as we always need more people in the choir."
    As they all waved goodbye to Luanne they went back to the undressing room and got dressed again, and Ned had to admit that he felt a little bit more secure now that he had clothing on once again, like finding a life jacket while lost at sea.
    "Anyway Ned we had a great time today, and I really hope that you will come to church with me again next week," Rebecca said. "Do you think maybe we could all join the choir?"
    Now that they were wearing clothing again Ned could focus on something other than the fact that they were naked, although he found himself mentally undressing both Rebecca and Lucinda almost as soon as they were dressed again as he certainly couldn't get that image out of his mind of what they look like naked. He couldn't believe how casual they were about the fact that they were naked, about how he knew what they looked like naked.
    The thought of standing up in front of hundreds of people completely naked and singing was an unimaginable nightmare of embarrassment to Ned, but as he stood there looking at Rebecca and once again picturing what she and Lucinda looked like naked, to say nothing of Luanne, he found himself gritting his teeth.
    "You know Rebecca why not, let's all join the choir," Ned said.
    "Great, I will sign us all up," Rebecca said, and just like that it was a done deal.

    "So how did things go with Rebecca at church," Jackson said rolling his eyes. "She wasn't like one of those holy roller fundamentalists was she?"
    "No, I think it was actually a very very very progressive church, very," Ned said.
    Jackson smiled. "Well it's great that you had such a fun time at church, although I have a feeling that it's going to be a really long time before you see some type of church girl like that slipping out of her clothing for you. But hey you said you wanted to take it slow, so I guess that works out pretty well for you."
    "Actually I joined the choir."
    "You joined the choir, I've never heard you sing anything."
    "Well hey, how hard could it be?" Certainly not as hard as he was when seeing all those naked bodies! "Besides Rebecca is actually a really great girl, and I met some of her friends at her church, and they were all really nice." Really nice and crazy hot and naked!
    "Yeah but nice girls can sometimes be uptight girls."
    "You know you are wrong about that, just because somebody is religious doesn't mean that they are uptight, let's just say when I said this was a very very progressive church I really meant it, and believe me Rebecca is certainly not uptight, I mean good God is she not uptight."
    "Well dude it sounds like she's a keeper."
    Later that night as Ned went to sleep and thought about Rebecca and her amazing naked body, he had to think to himself that Jackson was certainly right, she was a keeper. However as he went to sleep that night he also felt kind of weird at the thought that God was watching him when he was naked. Then he thought more awkwardly what if God were female and how much more awkward that would be. He kind of wondered what people at the church thought of that.

    "Well Ned, God created us the way we are, so why should we be ashamed of our bodies," Rebecca said at church that next Sunday as they started getting undressed.
    "Well doesn't it seem weird to you that there is this all powerful being and they are watching you while you are naked?" Ned said.
    "You know I had never actually thought about it, I guess I'm just not really self-conscious about those things. Why does the idea of something like that watching you make you feel kind of awkward? Because you know it shouldn't, I mean if there is an all-powerful being who created you in his image he certainly shouldn't be judging you for looking like he is, or she is. We tend to believe that God doesn't actually have a sex but that God created both of the sexes so that they can enjoy each other, enjoy each other's beauty, so that we could appreciate our bodies and the differences we have between them. I can appreciate your body, I hope you can appreciate mine."
    Ned smiled. "Believe me Rebecca, I really really appreciate your body, whether clothed or unclothed."
    "That's really sweet of you Ned," Rebecca said as she kissed him which gave him a warm tingly feeling throughout his body, his admittedly naked, vulnerable and exposed body.
    Ned found that Rebecca actually was surprisingly spiritual about all of this naked stuff, to the point where she didn't even seem to think any of it was the least bit strange. Maybe he had been looking at things the wrong way. He always told himself that there was nothing shameful about the human body, was always very liberal on sexual matters, but social conditioning ran pretty deeply, and the idea of all of this uninhibited nudity was certainly a new sensation and experience for him.
    As they took their places in the choir to begin singing Ned couldn't help the fact that he was still getting an erection seeing all of the naked women around him, but strangely enough as they began singing he started to focus more on, well the singing part! All of these people seemed to be extremely comfortable being vulnerable because they kept mentioning how when you believe in a higher power you have nothing to feel ashamed of, that being vulnerable is a sign of strength, not weakness.
    As Ned, Rebecca, Lucinda and numerous other parishioners started meeting multiple times a week to practice in the choir, the strange thing was that Ned actually was getting used to the sensation of being naked in public. He still found himself blushing and getting excited, but the strange thing was as they focused on the singing amazingly sometimes even forgot that he was up there completely naked.
    "You have all been doing great, this is one of the best choirs I have ever had the pleasure to teach," Luanne said. "You are all a testament to God's grace. And I hope that at the big midnight mass on Christmas Eve that you will have people packing into the pews."
    Ned had to admit that the idea of a large audience was intimidating, but he figured that the chances of him meeting anybody that he knew were still pretty slim, so that made him relax a little bit.

    "Hey Ned, long time no see," Jody, his ex-girlfriend, said as she ran into him one day.
    "Oh Jody, hi, how have you been," he said feeling really awkward because they sort of left on bad terms. He never felt comfortable around Jody the way he did around Rebecca. Made because Jody was a little bit high maintenance, a little bit status obsessed, always wearing the fanciest clothing and jewelry and everything. When Madonna was singing the song material girl she was probably thinking about somebody like Jody.
    "I've been pretty good, I heard that you're going out with some type of holy roller choir girl now," Jody said. "I never had you pegged as the religious type, although you always were a little bit uptight."
    "Her name is Rebecca, and she's not some kind of fundamentalist, she is very open-minded and very comfortable in her own skin," Ned said perhaps not wanting to phrase the last line the way he did. In fact he had never met somebody more comfortable in their own skin than Rebecca, certainly nobody who felt as comfortable exposing her skin to the world as Rebecca. "We are actually in the choir together."
    "So you're a choirboy now, wow," Jody said. "What church do you go to?"
    "Why, are you thinking about joining?" Ned said rather sarcastically as he knew that Jody was certainly not the religious type, and if she knew that he was going to a nudist church she would never let him live it down.
    Jody shook her head. "No I don't go out for all of that religion with their anti-materialism and holier than thou attitudes and all of that repression and misogyny."
    "Not all churches are like that Jody, this is actually a very liberal, progressive and open-minded church, probably the most open-minded church I have ever been to, not that I have been to a lot of churches mind you."
    "Well maybe I will have to look it up sometime," Jody said snorting as she shook her head. "Anyway Ned have fun being a choirboy."
    Ned had to admit that Jody always made him feel uncomfortable, and he was surprised that they lasted as long as they did. He felt that Jody was rather judgmental and a little bit snobby, although she was attractive, he wasn't going to deny that, in fact he wouldn't have dated her if that weren't the case. He never thought that he was her type, and he never thought that he had a chance with her, but when he got the chance he wasn't about to turn it down as she was sort of a big woman around campus so to speak.
    "Now Jody is the last person I would want to run into at church," he said shaking his head.

    On the night of the big Christmas pageant where he would be singing in front of the largest audience he had so far, Ned was certainly nervous. Although he had somewhat gotten used to being naked in the choir like that he still felt intimidated the more people that happened to frequent the church.
    "Are you ready to go out there and knock them dead tonight," Rebecca said as they got undressed in the undressing room.
    "Yeah, we are going to really be great up there," Ned said, even though he had to admit that he was suddenly getting cold feet. However he promised that he would do this and he didn't want to let Rebecca down, so he swallowed his pride once again and forced himself to go up there in the choir.
    The turnout was rather large as there was probably a lot of people who even at a naked church only went on Christmas and Easter, and it definitely seemed as though the church were packed, but seeing as everybody else in the church was likewise naked at least he blended in with the crowd, and that helped him to relax a little bit.
    However about halfway through the whole production that was when he noticed somebody in the back of the church, someone who stood out for the fact that they were naked, in fact they were quite well-dressed. It was Jody, and not just Jody but she had her friends Justine and Amber who were likewise pointing at them and laughing and seemingly holding up their camera phones.
    As soon as Ned saw her looking over in his direction with that arrogant look in her eyes and laughing at him, he suddenly started losing all of his confidence and was finding it hard to keep singing.
    "Is something the matter Ned," Rebecca whispered to him as she looked over in the distance and could see that Jody and her friends were in the back of the church having a grand old time poking fun at all of the naked people. "Don't let them get to you."
    Ned knew that Rebecca was right, but at the same time the fact that he was standing up there naked and making a fool of himself in front of his ex-girlfriend and her equally snobby friends was utterly humiliating beyond belief.
    When the service was over Ned was quite glad to get out of there, and wanted to run right towards the undressing room so that he could put his clothing back on, until he noticed that Jody and her friends were blocking the way. He wanted to find some way to escape from this situation but he didn't see any way out of it as he saw Jody and her friends walking over with confident strides, and clearly not hiding the fact that they couldn't stop snickering.
    "Well well well, when I heard you were a choirboy I certainly wasn't expecting this," Jody said as Ned began covering himself up and blushing profusely as Jody, Justine and Amber were barely able to contain themselves.
    "Jody, what are you doing here," Ned said barely able to make eye contact with her.
    "Well when I heard that you were going to a church and in a choir I looked up Rebecca's social media profile and could see that she was associated with this church, but when I realized what kind of a church it was, well God damn, how could I not check this out," Jody said as she laughed.
    "Please don't take the Lord's name in vain like that," Rebecca said.
    This was absolutely mortifying and Ned would have given anything to get out of there.
    "When I heard you were dating the religious girl like I certainly wasn't expecting this, not only is she not uptight she's a God damned exhibitionist," Jody said. "I always knew you were weird Ned, but wow a naked church, who in 1 million years would have thought that you would join a place like this? I mean aren't you ashamed of yourselves?"
    At that moment Ned had to admit that he felt more ashamed than ever before, he could feel his skin crawling, and he knew that now he must be blushing like never before. The fact that Jody was having at him and he didn't have a stitch of clothing on her while she was covered from head to toe made his confidence drop down to about zero. It was easy for him to feel comfortable naked when everybody else was naked, but now that he was confronted with his ex-girlfriend standing there dressed and laughing at his naked body he just wanted to crawl into a hole and die.
    "There's nothing to be ashamed of, this is just the way God made us," Rebecca said. "And it's the way God made you as well, because under our clothing we are all naked. It takes a person who is of deep faith to be able to just stand there naked before the world and to God."
    As Ned saw Rebecca standing up for herself, getting right up in Jody's face like that, it was at that moment he realized why he liked Rebecca so much better than he liked Jody. He always thought that Jody was confident, even arrogant, but Rebecca was both humble and strong at the same time.
    "You wouldn't have half the guts that Rebecca does," Ned said now making eye contact with Jody and trying not to shake too much over the fact that she was seeing every inch of him naked, as were Justine and Amber who were standing there snickering with her. "If you are so great, if you think you're such hot stuff, why don't you get naked like everybody else here?"
    Jody sort of snorted but as she looked around to see that she and her girlfriends were the only ones in the entire church who weren't naked, but she was outnumbered and it seemed as though her confidence was faltering a little bit.
    "As if I would become some type of stripper in a church, come on ladies, let's get out of here," Jody said walking off clearly uncomfortable as they stormed out through the undressing room.
    "Oh Ned I'm so proud of you for standing up like that, proving that your faith was stronger than her insults," Rebecca said as she hugged Ned causing a wave of arousal to go through his body, but he managed to control himself.
    "You know Rebecca I really mean it, you have taught me that it takes a lot of guts to allow yourself to be exposed and vulnerable like this, and I don't think I would have ever learned that I was capable of that if not for you," Ned said. "I can't believe I used to think that you were this uptight religious priss, and yet here you are probably the strongest woman that I have ever met, confident, unashamed and proud without being arrogant."
    "Oh Ned now you're making me blush," Rebecca said and for the first time she actually looked a little bit uncomfortable, and actually was blushing, as Ned likewise blushed.
    "Well hey as great as this all was maybe it's time for us to get dressed now," Ned said as Rebecca nodded and they went into the undressing room.
    As Ned saw everybody else in the undressing room slipping back into their clothing he kept looking around looking for his own outfit, that jacket that he had been wearing for as long as he had remembered, everybody knew it was him when he was wearing that jacket, and that was when he realized something terrible.
    "Jody," he said under his breath. As she was leaving she probably saw Ned's clothing on the hook there and decided to take it.
    "Well looks like someone's getting less shy, you're the only one who hasn't gotten dressed yet," Lucinda said as she and Rebecca stood there in front of Ned as he began blushing again.
    "It seems like your clothing might have been misplaced," Rebecca said as Luanne came back out once again fully dressed.
    "Well it looks like somebody doesn't want to leave church," Luanne said. As Ned stood there as the only one currently undressed he once again felt extremely self-conscious in front of these dressed women.
    He realized that there was probably no way out of this awkward situation so he simply smiled and laughed.
    "What's so funny," Rebecca said.
    "Well you said that in this church we dress the way that God made us, and I guess that God, in their infinite wisdom wanted me to stay dressed the way he made me," Ned said as everybody had a good laugh and he kept on laughing as long as he could, as that was probably the best way to forget that with his clothing having gone missing that until he found a resolution to this predicament that a lot more people were going to see him just as God intended.

    "So how did things go with Rebecca at your big choir thing?" Jackson asked a few days later. "Have you seen her naked yet?"
    Ned simply smiled and began laughing as Jackson simply shook his head and wondered what was so funny.